Showing posts with label bruce. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bruce. Show all posts

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Bob Ross is my new hero

I don't have any one hero. There is no singularity in my hero roster. A quick list of heroes off the top of my head includes Bruce Lee, my Dad, my friend Sir Alexander, and now-- Bob Freakin' Ross.

How does someone get so laid back and so cool? He's obviously an artistic genius, creating awesome paintings, but he's also... calming and soothing. Happy trees, happy clouds, happy mountains... They all seem so ridiculous, but he's says it so insignificantly, as if we all refer to bushes and water as "happy".

Anyway, I want to paint now.

Here's another excerpt from the book:

The door is open slightly, and I knock lightly before entering. On the right is a wooden door labeled “Sauna.“ To my left is the shower, a large communal type with high, broad shower heads. It is practically a large, stainless steel rain factory, and in the middle stands the Captain lathering her hair.

"Captain?" I ask.

She doesn't hear me at first, so I speak up, and with a calm turn, she faces me.

"What is it?"

"I was just wondering where the fruit was."

"It should be in the fruit holder in the fridge. Did you look there?"

"I thought I did, but I must have missed it. I'll look again."

I turn to go, but I catch a glimpse of a pink scar on her side. I opt not to say anything right now.

Rechecking the fridge yields nothing. It is empty of everything but milk and deer meat. I want to give the Captain her privacy, but something drives me to see her again. I reconsider and find myself heading down the hall once again.

This time, the Captain is facing the entryway as I enter.

"Not there?" She asks.

"No, there is only milk and deer meat in the fridge."

"That's odd. It was there last I checked. I'll find something for you in a minute." She rinses her hair and applies conditioner. Then notices that I haven't left. "Was there anything else?"

"I just noticed your scar there earlier and wondered what it was from."

"It's not the only one, but most of them are smaller. If you come closer you can see." She waves me over so I make my way there, avoiding the water, but little splashes catch me fairly often. When I get within a few feet, I notice, like she said, many more scars. My eyes open wide.

"Don't look so surprised. Everyone has scars."

"I know. I have my share, but you are covered. I didn't notice earlier on deck..."

"They only seem to show up when I'm in the water. Water healed them, and water reminds me…"

"Why is that do you think?"

"Like I said before, my storytelling is incredibly boring. Let's just say that scars sometimes contain ill feelings within them."

I'm not sure I understand, but I nod and turn to leave after taking one last look. The scars are all thick, knotted, and pink. It is strange that I didn't see them beforehand. I’ve never heard of scars that only show up in the water…

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Speed Racer, Bruce Lee, and Aging Hips

I went on a walk today. Not a jog, cause I'm a wuss, but a walk. I think I made it about 5 miles round-trip, which trashed my hip. I guess my left leg is shorter than my right, or at least my spine is crooked enough to make some kind of distinction. About 3/4 of the way through my journey my leg started to ache, and by the time I got back to my bedroom I was done walking for awhile. This wouldn't have happened if I had kept up my usual walking routine, but the way winter was back in Lyman this year I couldn't keep anything up. ZING!

So, while I was on my walk, I passed by Walmart, and cut across the parking lot to get downtown. I saw Christian Slater pushing carts with a yellow little safety vest on. He has a sunburn and it appears that meth abuse has damaged his teeth. Still slicks his hair back stylishly though, which is comforting.

While I'm speaking of obscure celebrities, Bruce Lee works at a Chinese restaurant in Rock Springs, Wyoming. It's called The Wonderful House, and it is the only good thing about Rock Springs, Wyoming. I had some delightful Cherry Chicken there once, and another time I had Sesame Chicken that was probably the best Sesame Chicken I've ever had, and I've eaten at just about every Chinese restaurant in Wyoming. Bruce has aged well, but his hairline has receded significantly. He also appears to have lost the ability to speak English properly, but hey, it's Rock Springs. I'm not surprised.

Lastly, I saw Speed Racer tonight. I already wrote a bit about it and posted it at Cracked.com so I'll just link to it. It it it it it it it. If you say "it" over and over you say funny words.

http://www.cracked.com/forums/index.php?topic=29679.msg867182#msg867182